Dear God: Let me give you a list of just some of the things I must remember to be a good Dog.
1. I will not eat the cats' food before they eat it or after they throw it up.
2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I like the way they smell.
3. The litter box is not a cookie jar.
4. The sofa is not a 'face towel'.
5. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.
6. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet.
7. I don't need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm under the coffee table
8. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house - not after.
9. I will not come in from outside and immediately drag my hiney.
12. The cat is not a 'squeaky toy' so when I play with him and he makes that noise, it's usually not a good thing.